JACKIE WEEK 1

Emotionally: Ai-ya, this has honestly been one of the most overwhelming weeks I've had in college so far. (case in point: yesterday one of my profs handed each of us a 20 pg. manuscript on how to write our 15 pg. research paper, and gave us two other major assignments). Usually I'm pretty good when it comes to academic stress, but I was in the library studying for a test on Monday and felt a huge wave of discouragement, frustration, and hopelessness. I knew the waterworks were coming so I packed up everything and went to the small prayer chapel on campus. It is absolutely AMAZING to be experience God's presence and HOPE in the midst of my internal chaos. I was sharing with my small group the other day that sometimes we think finding God means to be active--singing praise songs loudly in church, raising our hands, praying audibly, etc.--but owe forget that sometimes all it takes is to just sit in the silence and wait upon him. That sometimes he wants, or even NEEDS for us to rest in his presence in order for him to reveal things to us that we would've never known otherwise! At the prayer chapel, I was able to calm my heart and graciously reminded of Matthew 11:28--

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."

God DESIRES for us to find rest in HIM. He convicted me of not spending enough time with him as well as trying to solve everything myself--taking on school work, social life, etc. all on my own. Also, being anxious about things that will fall in place in HIS time. It was rainy and gloomy that day, but for a couple of seconds the sun decided to say hello and I took this picture inside the prayer chapel. Here it is for some of you non-instagrammers:

Needless to say, this picture will serve as a good reminder of myself of who I can turn to and find rest in in the chaos of my life. I desire to have a closer intimacy with him as well as frequently seeking him in the midst of all the other noises in my life. It's still a journey in the making, but I'm excited to see what God has in store. 

Insights:

Psalm 36:7-9

This passage revealed some of God's characteristics to me. I was reminded again of his grace while reading about his "unfailing love" and the abundant goodness he delivers. The verse talking about being "under his wings" made me think of the ducks waddling around campus right now and how Mama Quacks is always the constant protector and provider for her baby Quacks--kind of how we get the privilege of resting and finding firm protection within our Savior's arms (wings). Also, that God is our light and it is through him that we are able to be directed through the right path.

Psalm 43:3-5

The words "light and truth" stuck out to me in this passage. David is asking the Lord to use light and truth to GUIDE him to the place where God dwells. I think those two words go hand in hand, where light is able to uncover hidden truth, and truth is able to help the light shine. Knowing this gives me hope and reassurance that I will be able to find hope and rest through God's LIGHT and TRUTH because he is FAITHFUL.

Psalm 119:105

"Thy word is a lamp unto my feet.." This song played in my head as I was meditating on this verse. It's funny trying to visual this because I imagined trying to walk around with a Bible lit up with Christmas tree lights (don't ask why) duct taped to my feet, but afterwards I thought of the Word as an armor of God that's strapped to our feet. The Word is powerful and can guide us in different directions as well, being lit up like a lamp that can stand out in any darkness. 

Psalm 119:130

I think something so amazing about the Bible is something so universal. It could be understood by anybody--Christians, baby Christians, non-Christians, etc. The Word is simple, yet a powerful sense of peace, breath of fresh air, and spiritual renewal. 

Physical: I'm taking a weight training class (which is honestly the only time I "workout"). Today I progressed from my usual 5 pound dumbbells to whopping TEN POUNDERS (this. girl is on fiyahh!) and we were required to do 100 (yes, yi bai)  press ups total with our dumbbells with 10 squat jumps every minute for interval training--so I guess you can say my arms are getting ready to help carry our heavy luggage and piggyback little kids. I'm hoping to get back on the treadmill again to get in shape and prevent getting sick on the trip! 

That is all! I know most of you probably didn't read this far, but congratulations if you did! I forgot how much I missed blogging--it's quite therapeutic too. 

Have a GREAT rest of the week! 

Be kind, Love God, and make good choices. :)

-Jac